again my net was giving me a lot of troubles.
.so am up early morning..hve colg in next 1:30 hours…
me off to slog with studies!
and i have cried a lot while typing this..
something that happened for the first time during parineeta’s course.
its kind of very close to my heart
WARNING: SHAREEF people READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!
She walked lifeless…and her eyes fell on gayathri…standing at a corner..looking at her intently. She had that ‘we-told-you-so’ look on her face. She couldn’t even look at her! how could she be so damn wrong? Every assumption of hers were all proved wrong!!! Her weakened heart developed yet another crack..and it was too much painful this time…just unbearable pain!
He walked her towards the car when he felt her resistance. He looked at her face and was surprised to see a sudden change in her expressions..like she was about to break down.
Geet tried hard to conceal her feelings and smile back while she spoke to him..but still he didn’t know how he read her inside out. He pressed her closer to him, “kya hua Geet?”
[what happened Geet?]
Till now she was sure that he wouldn’t guess but she was surprised that he could know. But how? She tried to speak normally but her voice quivered, “wo…i…can I stay with roops tonight?”
He looked into her eyes… there was so much longing..so much sadness…and the way her lips trembled got him worried. He cupped her face and gently caressed his thumb over her cheeks, “tum theek tho ho na?”
[are you okay?]
She closed her eyes, trying to hold back those tears and nodded softly. He felt roops gently pull her away from him…and something in him told she wasn’t happy. He suddenly felt suffocated parting away from her life that…as if a part of his life was going away! He saw her get into the car with roops and vanish in the darkness. He stood there for a while…and then went back.
Geet sat quietly looking out of the window while gayatri’s words rang in her mind, “we’ll show you what you are and what Maan thinks of you”…she did really show her what she meant! His closeness flashed n her mind…. His touch..his kiss…. His caresses… the way he always looks into her eyes… was it only ‘best friend’ thing? She was his wife right?? She questioned herself..she had the rights to feel what she feels right… then why was it hurting?
Roops looked at Geet..and probably she was too choked to even speak. She just kept on holding Geet’s hand throughout while prem drove them to her place. Roops got off and helped her get in Geet hadn’t reacted all the time…she didn’t speak..she didn’t even cry… but the pain on her face was evident. Her eyes were brimming with unshed tears… they were full but they did not fall. As they walked in, jasmeet ran to Geet and hugged her, crying, “Geet..ye sab kaise hua beta…. And tu theek tho hain?”
[Geet..how come all this happened and are you okay?]
Jasmeet feared Geet breaking down… like she had been mercilessly broken down..but she knew her daughter was strong..stronger than her! but how much more can she bear? Roops looked at jasmeet in amusement, “aunty..you know?”
Jasmeet was so mad at Maan for making that statement. She looked at roops angrily, “its all over the news…”, she screamed and looked back at Geet who didn’t even seem to react at all. She just gave a look to them…a very cold look which rendered them speechless and walked slowly to her room. As Geet went, jasmeet broke down..she for the first time hated Maan for breaking Geet;s heart so brutally. Not that she felt so because Geet was her own daughter..but for she felt the same pain that she had endured years back! Roops and prem helped jasmeet sit and gave them water. Prem held her hands, “aunty please…sambhaliye apne aap ko… we’ll speak to Geet…”
[aunty please hold yourself..we’ll speak to Geet…]
Jasmeet wiped her tears, “I know…mein tho apne aap ko sambhaal lungi..but Geet toot jayegi prem….please help her…”
[I know..i will be able to hold on to myself…but Geet will break prem…help her..]
Roops wiped her tears, “no aunty..i know Geet. She won’t break this easily..i will speak to her!”
She saw Aryan reach her place in the next second and was worried to learn that Geet had locked herself in her room. They went to call her..but she never responded. They thought it was better to give her a little time…and they waited.
It was probably one hour later when roops finally knocked her door, “Geet…you there? Am coming in…”
She didn’t hear anything..not even the slightest of the movements. She was scared..but then she knew Geet wouldn’t do anything stupid! She slowly pushed the door and was surprised to see it open. For a moment she felt she could breath now and was shocked to see Geet sitting on the bed…she had changed into her pjs and her hair was let down. She just sat on the edge of the bed, her hands clutching the fabric on her thighs and her legs dangling down. She sat motionless..like a ghost. Roops didn’t know how to comfort her..still she walked closer and patted her shoulder, “Geet..tu theek hain?”
Geet slowly raised her face to look at her…which shocked roops further! There was no emotion on her face..just as she was in the car. She was quiet and she could see a certain emptiness slowly clouding her eyes. She was so scared.. she shook her violently, ‘Geet…do you hear me? He is a stupid Geet..tujhe tho pata hain na..Stop thinking about him..stop!!!”
Geet just blinked her eyes a couple of times..yet there was no emotion. Prem and Aryan rushed hearing roop’s voice and saw her shaking Geet like that. Prem held roops..and she just broke down in his arms. Aryan had never seen Geet like that… he bent down and held her hand and called out to her softly, “Geet… come back..listen to us… please..”
She had expected a lot of things from him… she had expected all her rights over him… she had expected love from him… and she was such a stupid! She even forgot the basic rule of life—never to expect anything from anyone! How could she? She was just his friend right…what had gotten into her??? just when everyone thought she was slipping into a n unknown darkness, they heard her speak, “does he love me? Bolo na… does he?”
Jasmeet was standing by the door…and she just couldn’t bear it. she ran to her room and cried. Roops wiped her tears and hugged her, “yes he does pagli…bahut pyaar karta hai tujhse….” She couldn’t have seen Geet like that..so cold and so emotionless and probably this was the only way to bring her back.
[yes he does pagli…he loves you a lot..]
She looked at roops expectantly, “you know…you were right! He is such a stupid. He loves you…”
“but he said am his friend na…”, her voice suddenly had a velvety touch that scared them even more. It was then Aryan realized she was more of trying to convince herself… she was trying to believe a lie… he had always seen a Geet who loved to make people smile..and this Geet… he hated Maan for doing this to her…he hated everything that pained her! but he was helpless at this point!
Roops tried to smile, trying to Get her back, “han..because that stupid has fallen in love with his friend…!! Aur tujhe tho pata hain na…about that marriage stuff? You should be happy Geet…he has fallen in love with the person he had always knows..his ‘Geet…’ “.
Her words rang in Geet’s mind…and somewhere that convinced her…his touch..that spark in his eyes… was all for her..his bestest of best friends. She smiled a bit..and a tear escaped her eyes..and another..and yet another. She lowered her head and they fell on her hands that still clutched her pjs.
Roops sighed in relief…and held her close to her! she sat beside Geet and placed her head over her shoulder. Geet didn’t cry out loud…she just sat there silently…her tears wetting roops shoulder! Prem sat beside her and held her hand, trying to cheer her up, “chal gundi..so ja..you are tired..”
[okay gundi..sleep..you are tired!]
Aryan caressed her hands, “yeah..in two days you have to give your first performance Geet.. take rest. You have to save your energy and excitement for that day!”
Roops slept beside her…but she couldn’t. it was half past 1am and she just couldn’t sleep at all. Roops was somewhere right… she tried to hold on to every possible hope she found around herself…. Yet his words rang in her mind. They were just friends…she tried to convince herself… but then she couldn’t forget his touch..his kiss…his claiming her wildly… his passion… she craved it even more for him. She closed her eyes… and even in that situation she could feel him all over over..kissing her..caressing her in every possible way ever… teasing her senses. As tears rolled out, vanishing in the pillow…her buds hardened just by her own thoughts as she felt herself throb with a need for him.
She could imagine losing herself to his kiss… as his hands slipped into her shirt, feeling those soft b***** under his rough palms and his mouth relishing her in every possible way she could ever imagine. Her hands ached to feel his raw supreme self..and as a reaction she caressed her own bare skin over her waist..feeling wet already. she wanted him..she wanted him beside her..now and immediately. Her one leg gently yet sensuously slid over the other…as she imagined him playing with her body. Her eyes snapped open and she sat up panting furiously. She saw roops in deep sleep…and there was nothing that could have stopped that burning passion within her. she just ran out like a maniac wearing her night suit and barefoot.
He was hell tired after he was back but a certain restlessness filled him. As he freshened up and landed on his bed…he felt something go wrong. He thought of the beautiful evening with her…and then the media thing. Her sad eyes flashed in front of his eyes…what had gone wrong? Why was she sad? She seemed pretty fine in the party itself..but then what was wrong? He hated to see her sad..and tried to recall events earlier that evening. Their dance..her loving gaze over him…her tantalizing smile…and that media thing. He recalled what he had said…’bestest of best friends..’ he smiled and closed his eyes..but he couldn’t sleep. He missed her badly… he smiled. He remembered her sweet peck while he dropped her in office everyday…it was silly how it had become his habit to see her around him every single day and him dropping her to her workplace..her sweet pecks. He recalled her getting ready for the party in the evening….even her thought was enough to tantalize her…the way she always lost herself to his mere touch..the way she surrendered silently to his demands…the way she kissed him in the car that night…. He felt in body tense..thinking of how she felt under his hands… so soft..and so hot!
He snapped his eyes open hearing his brain scream at him, “we’re bestest of best friends…childhood friends….” Her painful eyes flashed infront of him… and his heart seemed to laugh at him.. stop fantasizing about her..she is your ‘best friend’ right? He still didn’t want to open his eyes from her thoughts… she was away for one night..and he was just going insane. He felt the prick when his heart taunted him…’best friends’ and that look on her eyes..the way she offered herself to him… the way she looks at him..so lovingly… even her look seemed too sexy for him. He dared to think further..her soft plump lips over his… her softness yielding to his touch…his heart laughed again. “best friends..”
He was disturbed. And he longed for her. why did she go away? Was she hurt? What was wrong with him? He looked blankly at the ceiling for a long time…what was going wrong? Will she be crying now? Was she alright? Everything just seemed to make him mad. He couldn’t bear it. he wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her till eternity. He wanted to feel every inch of hers till she screamed his name. this distance was too much. his growing fondness for her was just too much. he got off the bed and walked out to see her. he was running down the stairs when she collided with someone. For a moment he thought it was some thief at this time of night… but then he felt himself getting surrounded by a very familiar warmth that he had been craving for so much.
Was she back? He couldn’t believe and hugged her tight. How come she was there at this time of night? He pulled her away and lifted her head holding her chin. Her every gesture seemed to scream his name…her eyes longed for him..like they were waiting for his one grace look..her hands clutched him tighter feeling him right in front of her. he took a closer look and was surprised to see her in that dress.
“what are you doing here at this time of night?”
She cried and hugged him even tighter, “I can’t live without you..”
He didn’t even need to think anything further. He lifted her up in his arms and walked straight to her room. She rested her head on his shoulder, trying to take in all his warmth that she had missed all this while. He gently laid her on the bed and raised up to get her spread. She denied to leave him… he looked at her with a questioning gaze and the next moment she raised and took his lips in all of a sudden. His every cell was longing for her… and how could he just not give in seeing her so vulnerable..so longing for him? He kissed her back not wasting a single second and pulled her closer into his embrace. It was all she ever wanted. She smiled…seeing the light after so many hours of darkness….he loved her perhaps. She pulled him on top her hers and the next moment he was completely resting on her, pushing her deep into the mattress, kissing her madly and insanely. He had missed her too much.
He pushed his tongue in, taking out all that rawness within her. she moaned so loud that broke something within her. he left her lips and dipped his head in to her neck, biting that soft flesh so roughly..and she even smiled with that pain. Her dreams haunted her…and she couldn’t hold back anymore. Her hands went under his vest, tossing it off and took the liberty of feeling his hot flesh under her palms. He groaned giving into her love and he brought his lips back on hers. His one hand slid slid down her neck..down to the valley of her curves over her dress and further down to her midriff before stopping there.
She was so enjoying his free access to her but felt disappointed feeling him stop. She almost cried in need and dug her fingers into his back, punishing him for stopping. Her tongue fought with his violently… pleading..demanding him to tread further. The wetness settled between her legs as she pressed herself more into her…biting his lips harshly, crying into the kiss. She was emotionally so worked up. He felt her anger and chuckled within…and the next moment she heard was the ripping off of her shirt. She smiled after a long time and kissed him softly, yielding herself to him to move further. Seeing her surrender so sweetly, he lost his sanity. His hands cupped one of her b***** and pulled down the cup, revealing that pink mound of flesh to all his view. He stopped for a second and looked down at her. she was so lost in him… so much drowned in his passion and so wanting to give into him. He just couldn’t stop right now. He bent forward and took that exposed mound into his mouth, suckling so hard that earned him her loudest moan, “Maan…I…“
She wanted to tell him that she loved him but his passion seemed to drown her voice as well. His unhooked her bra and pushed them away, feeling irritated. his fingers felt those hardened buds..and suddenly there was a something more between them he felt. His heart seemed to lose itself with her close proximity. His hardness was so evident… she gave out a sigh feeling it align along her body perfectly. As he concentrated on the counterpart..his hand did seem to work their own way down her…gently cupping her core , rubbing her hard. She could probably have cried with happiness…roops was so right. She still tried to hold on to the tiniest of the hope.
She didn’t want him to hold himself back anymore, especially feeling his throbbing hardness at her right places…but tiredness consuming her was too powerful to overcome her desire. She kissed his chest all over as his fingers swiftly moved into her pants, slowly pulling them down. He was sweating with this itself..the arousal was just too much. her eyes were slowly closing when she felt that extreme pleasure just with his touch over her panties, feeling her wetness. It was mind boggling..and she lost all her power to think! His intimate touch was driving her insane and she shuddered..but too tired to even resist those heavy lashes.
He finally stopped, feeling contended with his pleasure…biting those pink buds till they begged for him to stop and moved up to look at her face… looking to her eyes before he moved further but was surprised to see her asleep with tear trails down her cheeks. He sighed and kissed her on her forehead, “you are making me crazy Geet…” and got off her. she was just too tired. His gaze travelled over her bare body and those evident marks of his passion. He smiled and looked at her sleeping form and pulled the spread over them, making sure she was covered properly.
He closed his eyes, taking her in his arms.. she was so warm by now. There was definitely something between them… he realized and yet again his heart taunted ‘best friends’. He looked at her…and then at his words…sh4e had drove back last night only for him… were they still best friends? But the way she made him want her so carnally..he realized there was more to this ‘best friend’ thing… something very deep and heavy. He closed his lid, forgetting everything around him…strangely he had forgotten everything around him the day she had moved in with him.
He woke up with the early rays of sun falling on his eyes. He yawned and the first thing he checked on was her. she was still sleeping peacefully, snuggled to him. E smiled and kissed her cheeks once again. she shifted a bit and moved closer to him. He checked his phone that he had placed beside the bed. It was in silent mode. He was just too disturbed last night to even check his phone…20 missed calls from Thakur haveli. He wondered why was that so… and it suddenly felt he had forgotten something important. He placed pillows around her and got off the bed. He wore his vest and walked out, trying to call back, wondering what was wrong. He locked the room properly before going out and got back to his room and freshened up. He wore his sit and walked down….Trying to call back.
Dadima was furious seeing that news early morning…thet had been showing that since last night and she checked just now. She saw Geet’s reaction..and she knew what must have been going on. She was so mad! Was Maan out of his mind?? Did he even think before speaking such stuffs? Her heart went out for Geet… suddenly she felt her decision of getting them married go wrong..everything was going wrong. She saw Maan coming down, trying to call someone. She switched off the tv and stood by the stairs, looking at him angrily. Maan saw her and smiled, “good morning Dadima..”
“Maan..we need to talk..what…”
He cut her off, “ek minute Dadima… I need to finish this call…”
He heard gayathri answer the call and she sounded a little down. He asked if there was anything wrong but she just asked him to come over immediately. He felt that worry in her voice..and something just told him that he was forgetting something…something important! He needed to check immediately. Dadima tried to speak but he just walked off saying he had some urgent work. Throughout the entire drive..he just couldn’t take his mid off Geet…was she still asleep or was she awake? He smiled and guessed she must be still asleep.
He stopped in front of thakur haveli and walked in. there was too much of a silence… something like graveyard…and he didn’t like it. the haveli seemed to taunt him over something that he couldn’t even remember. Why did gayahtri aunty call him urgently and why did she sound worried? He walked in..and a sweet fragrance reached his nostrils..was it those incense sticks? He walked and and it was strange that no one was around when the haveli was always bustling with people. He took off his shoes and walked into the hall where he had seen servants coming out…all in white. He wondered what was going on..and walked in. he saw gayathri standing at one corner silently, all clad in white. Fear of something unknown just gripped his heart… and what he saw just shook his entire being! There was a huge pic of anisha with a garland of flower around it. there were incense sticks and a dia lightened in front of the pic. The panditji was done with his puja. Gayathri waited for Maan..it never happened that he lacked in his duties but she was actually sad that he never showed up and carried on with the puja.
He stood there numb..how could he forget? It was her second death anniversary…and he just forgot all about it!!! how could he? He stood there motionless…. For a moment he had completely forgotten that there was someone called anisha who was his life..his love..his beloved wife…everything… and he forgot all about her death anniversary? It was actually a shock for him… and a feeling of shame and guilt washed over!
next : Maan in dilemma